As a family we will walk through this difficult time together

Saturday, February 23, 2013

Beena a LONG LONG time since I was able to sit and write but this is a REASON!! Back to two years ago, again can’t believe it has been two years. I was sitting saying goodbye to Tristan and Savanna at Mel’s house not really knowing how long they would be there, but again with what we were told I didn’t see it being to long. The thing is I was supposed to be induced, but true to Faith I just went into labor on my own that next morning. It was like she was listening and knew it was time to start fighting, and fight she did. Almost one whole year went by since she had to seen the inside of a hospital room again, 3 days to be exact, but that soon drastically changed again. She had got her transfer set changed on her PD catheter replaced 4 days earlier(which I really believe what happened) she got sick, and sick quick . We checked into Children’s on May 25th not knowing what we were going to deal with but hoping all the same that it was just something meds would fix. That would soon change when the two doctors walked in the room to tell us that on top of peritonitis she had a fungal infection which would require her to get her catheter removed because her peritoneum would may now be too scared to use for dialysis and so she would have to be put on Hemo until the infection cleared. The whole time the doctors were talking to us I held it together pretty good until they asked if I had questions, and at that point all I could think of was transplant. She had JUST been referred so I knew it wasn't a push asking if that could be an option instead of doing Hemo dialysis till the next surgery to put the PD catheter which may not even work. They said they would ask, and that is when we PUSHED. On August 23rd, a day before Tristan’s 9thbirthday me and her went into surgery to exchange my kidney to my baby girl. I was able to save my baby girl. I got flack from some people saying how I could take that risk when I had other children to live for. That was sickening to me, kind of like the doctors asking how much we would do to make Faith live. My answer ANYHTING I CAN. So tonight we are just hours from when she was rushed and cared for into this word. She was never welcomed but rushed and worried over. I think seeing that she had to show them it was worth it. She lies here tonight asleep, just done with her nepo shots and ready to celebrate her birthday with close family since the risk of sickness is way too high. See I kind of had a false sense of security when she had her transplant thinking that we would be in the clear but that is far far from true. The risk of cold, flu, or normal sickness is not a no biggy for us. Especially with the white counts being the way they have been with the meds she is on. I had a mom of another transplant child ask me if I was worried or scared to go home. I said no not much just need to get used to our new “norm” well little did I know how much it would really affect me, my husband and our relationship. Trying to constantly now worrying and praying God gives you strength, you forget to pray for your marriage, again something the doctors told us would suffer. We have tried really hard to not let it destroy us, but I would be lying if it was not very very hard. More than anything though we are about to hold hands together about to sing our miracle, and I again say miracle baby Happy 2nd birthday. Our Faith will be 2!! She is crawling trying to walk and such a joy you give so many around us I feel blessed to have been the mom to deal with this road God has given us because you can’t have another baby so special, happy, and so important to so many. Happy birthday baby girl I love you so very much and years from now I hope you can look back and see how much you were loved and prayed for. Mom