What 24 hours can change? I am still in shock of how
everything changed. I will rewind a few days just to give perspective. This
last weekend we were able to spend whole time at Banks Lake in Eastern
Washington for Dans’ sister’s wedding, which was beautiful. We left on Monday
morning to head back to the hospital to start our week again. See coming from
home to here is bad enough, but coming back here from a short vacation is even
harder. That evening after dinner Dan had to go home with Tristan for football
camp, and to check on the house and animals. I have been trying my hardest not
to keep track of the time we have been trying to juggle all of this, but this
week it is beginning to be too much, and for the kids too. Knowing the kids are
getting sick of it, and not having fun with it anymore makes it that much
harder to stay positive through all of this.
So when Dan left that night I broke down. Being in
situations like this I am sure it is normal to have times that you break down,
and if you don’t I think you may go internally insane. Lucky enough though that
the kids aren’t in school yet so they can be here with us and not trying to
juggle that to. So I started my Tuesday morning pretty low already, and it also
was the day I knew they were going to conference on all my testing for donating
to Faith. Page, the Donor advocate, every time I have called or got a call from
her the last few weeks she always has had a disappointed tone to her voice and
not good news each time, so I was quite a bit nervous waiting that day for the
call on what the outcome was.
Well about 4:50 I still hadn’t heard anything so I called
her, and again her voice switched to that tone when she knew who it was. I
asked if they went over my file and if I was approved. She responded saying, ”Kami
didn’t call you?”, in a very confused
disappointed way, and I of course I said no. Well she then proceeded to tell me
that they did go over my file but I wasn’t approved, but not disapproved??? Ok
what the heck does that mean? All she could tell me is I wasn’t approved, and
they needed to do further testing, nothing else. I got off the phone with my
heart in my stomach with no answer besides I wasn’t approved. By the time I got
off with her it was 5 and couldn’t get through to any other numbers. So I had
to sit with that all night not knowing why, what happened, what was said,
nothing till the morning. So on top of already being low, hearing that, and
being alone was enough to make for a long night.
The next morning I started calling right at 8, and of course
no answers on any phones. She had her monthly nephrology appointment, and was
hoping for some info to give them so maybe she could help me figure it out what
to do if anything, but of course no calls back. Once dialysis was done my
parents showed up and I had to do an interview for a newsletter on dialysis,
and then they called. It wasn’t Kami who is the person who was supposed to call
but the lady who sets up all appointments, she told me I needed to do a double
kidney function test and that Kami would be calling. As we left Ruth, Faiths
Nephrology doctor called and asked if I had got a call. She then hit me with
the news, I was approved! They just needed to do this test to make sure I am
left with the kidney that functions the best. When I hung up the phone the room
began to spin and I felt like I was going to throw up. Less than an hour ago I
thought I wasn’t going to be able to save my baby girl and now I’m approved and
able to? A lot to take in, and in public for that matter. As I walked back to
the apartment to get my things I finally got a call from Kami. She asked if I
got her message, which I didn’t, and began to tell me why they needed to do the
test and that both Children’s surgeons and their team had seen the files and
approved it. So she said she was going to start looking at the schedule, which
I assumed she meant for the appointment, but no…for our surgeries!!
So to put this in cliff notes, in less than 24 hours I went
from panic not knowing how long I could handle being here and not knowing who
would be able to be a match for her, or what was wrong with what they saw, or
what I could do to change their minds. To waiting to hear the dates they found
for the surgery for us. Amazing how God works, frustrating sometimes, but
amazing all the same. So here is to finding a date soon!!
