What 24hours can change

What 24 hours can change? I am still in shock of how everything changed. I will rewind a few days just to give perspective. This last weekend we were able to spend whole time at Banks Lake in Eastern Washington for Dans’ sister’s wedding, which was beautiful. We left on Monday morning to head back to the hospital to start our week again. See coming from home to here is bad enough, but coming back here from a short vacation is even harder. That evening after dinner Dan had to go home with Tristan for football camp, and to check on the house and animals. I have been trying my hardest not to keep track of the time we have been trying to juggle all of this, but this week it is beginning to be too much, and for the kids too. Knowing the kids are getting sick of it, and not having fun with it anymore makes it that much harder to stay positive through all of this.

So when Dan left that night I broke down. Being in situations like this I am sure it is normal to have times that you break down, and if you don’t I think you may go internally insane. Lucky enough though that the kids aren’t in school yet so they can be here with us and not trying to juggle that to. So I started my Tuesday morning pretty low already, and it also was the day I knew they were going to conference on all my testing for donating to Faith. Page, the Donor advocate,  every time I have called or got a call from her the last few weeks she always has had a disappointed tone to her voice and not good news each time, so I was quite a bit nervous waiting that day for the call on what the outcome was.

Well about 4:50 I still hadn’t heard anything so I called her, and again her voice switched to that tone when she knew who it was. I asked if they went over my file and if I was approved. She responded saying, ”Kami didn’t call you?”,  in a very confused disappointed way, and I of course I said no. Well she then proceeded to tell me that they did go over my file but I wasn’t approved, but not disapproved??? Ok what the heck does that mean? All she could tell me is I wasn’t approved, and they needed to do further testing, nothing else. I got off the phone with my heart in my stomach with no answer besides I wasn’t approved. By the time I got off with her it was 5 and couldn’t get through to any other numbers. So I had to sit with that all night not knowing why, what happened, what was said, nothing till the morning. So on top of already being low, hearing that, and being alone was enough to make for a long night.

The next morning I started calling right at 8, and of course no answers on any phones. She had her monthly nephrology appointment, and was hoping for some info to give them so maybe she could help me figure it out what to do if anything, but of course no calls back. Once dialysis was done my parents showed up and I had to do an interview for a newsletter on dialysis, and then they called. It wasn’t Kami who is the person who was supposed to call but the lady who sets up all appointments, she told me I needed to do a double kidney function test and that Kami would be calling. As we left Ruth, Faiths Nephrology doctor called and asked if I had got a call. She then hit me with the news, I was approved! They just needed to do this test to make sure I am left with the kidney that functions the best. When I hung up the phone the room began to spin and I felt like I was going to throw up. Less than an hour ago I thought I wasn’t going to be able to save my baby girl and now I’m approved and able to? A lot to take in, and in public for that matter. As I walked back to the apartment to get my things I finally got a call from Kami. She asked if I got her message, which I didn’t, and began to tell me why they needed to do the test and that both Children’s surgeons and their team had seen the files and approved it. So she said she was going to start looking at the schedule, which I assumed she meant for the appointment, but no…for our surgeries!!

So to put this in cliff notes, in less than 24 hours I went from panic not knowing how long I could handle being here and not knowing who would be able to be a match for her, or what was wrong with what they saw, or what I could do to change their minds. To waiting to hear the dates they found for the surgery for us. Amazing how God works, frustrating sometimes, but amazing all the same. So here is to finding a date soon!!